Saying Yes

[This post was supposed to be published here on August 8, but I forgot to hit the button. Here it is, better late than never, for those of you who haven’t already seen it on Facebook.]

Today is Sadie's birthday. Her 44th, a number which wouldn’t have meant much to her. Sadie didn’t fret over her age.

It goes without saying that 43 years wasn’t long enough. Ninety-three years wouldn’t have been long enough. We take solace in knowing that Sadie made multiple lifetimes’ worth of impact on those around her. She loved us and we loved – we love – her. Sadie did immeasurable good for countless souls.

Jim Carrey starred in a film back in 2008 called Yes Man. In it, Carrey plays a character mired in routine and negativity. After attending a self-help seminar, he is convinced to say “yes” to anything asked of him. Being a comedy, the film of course puts Carrey in a variety of absurd situations, but [spoiler alert] he ultimately learns that while one probably shouldn’t go through life saying “yes” to everything, “yes” generally brings you more satisfaction and does more good overall.

Sadie was a Yes Woman. Saying “yes” got her from junior high band to San Diego and Dublin. Saying “yes” got her from jogs along Sheridan Boulevard to marathons in Minneapolis. “Yes” got her three children, and then more children, and then even more – from Lincoln and Boston and Tajikistan and Brazil. It got her careers as a teacher, as a homeschool mom, as a counselor, as a mental health advocate.

Saying “yes” got her me. (Nobody’s perfect.)

Sadie said “yes” to each of us. She gave us second and third and fourth chances. She believed in us and gave us the opportunity to succeed.

I am not a Yes Man. I like my comfort zone, thankyouverymuch. However, I cannot deny the success of Sadie’s approach. When I follow her example, I and those around me wind up better off. It’s hard for me; saying “yes” requires a tremendous amount of conscious effort. I’m working on it.

Several people have messaged me about how Sadie might have celebrated her birthday today. There would have been coffee. Chocolate. Carrot cake. Probably a request for my mom’s rolls. She would have spent time with as many of us as possible. We would have given her gifts.

We can’t give her gifts to unwrap today, but that doesn’t mean we can’t give her anything. I invite you to join me today in lighting a birthday candle for Sadie. When you blow it out, instead of making a wish, say “yes”. Say “yes” to anything: to taking the kids miniature golfing instead of watching TV; to adopting a shelter pet; to skydiving; to learning to make bread. Then tell us about it. Here’s mine:

I said “yes” earlier this week to clearing up a literal pile of to-dos that had paralyzed me, in several cases for months. Some of the to-dos were expensive. Some required difficult conversations. One was canceling Sadie’s phone number, a bit of finality that was much harder for me than you might expect. I’m not yet finished – in fact, I’ve had to add a few items – but I’ve made excellent progress and I have a plan for the remainder. Most importantly, I feel so much better about myself.

Today, give the gift of saying "yes". Happy birthday, Sadie. We love you.